I want to live in the moment. Right now, not the future. I know that sounds simplistic, naive but it's suddenly this overwhelming urge. Present.
There are things I want in life, goals, dreams, future 'plans' but I don't want them to define who I am today. I don't want to be stuck waiting on the future - for everything to be aligned, perfect.
I want what makes me feel alive right now. In this instant. I believe everything is destined to be what it is meant to - we are presented with forks in the road - unexpectedly - and we get to make a choice, pick a path on this journey. Experiences, people, adventures. Decisions that define us, teach us, move us forward, take us where we're meant to go. Every single step.
And I fully understand that choices I make today may some day cause me hurt, pain - but that isn't enough reason to hold back. What-ifs and regrets won't make me happy, they'll temper my existence, moderated, mundane. I want exceptional and amazing a true roller coaster of emotions - to live fully - pure passions contrasted with dark days. I trust too that the good will by far outweigh the bad - the bad making the good so pure and magnificent in contrast. Fully alive.
Every past choice has made us who we are today, every breath. And now, now I yearn to take the bold chances - take them all - because they might turn into the perfectly formed future anyway. And if not at least I'll have the memories, the smiles, the pure unfiltered living. To me, that is enough.
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